Courtship is a relationship between a man and a woman in which they seek to determine if it is God’s will for them to marry each other.
Under the protection, guidance, and blessing of parents or mentors, the couple concentrates on developing a deep friendship that could lead to marriage, as they discern their readiness for marriage and God’s timing for their marriage.
I noticed myself nodding in recognition as I ticked off the kinds of issues that clients I have seen as a therapist for the past three decades have presented in our sessions.
They range from not knowing the person in the mirror well enough to being disillusioned by the person on the other side of the bed.
But how are you supposed to know which one is the right one?
(See II Corinthians 5:7, Psalm , Romans , Psalm 13, and I John 4:8.) Because each individual, family, and set of circumstances is unique, each courtship will be unique.
While those who choose courtship will hold to general guidelines for the relationship, their specific choices about when, where, and how to court may differ according to their needs and circumstances.
So many people create new relationships on the wreckage of old interactions. I’ll live with myself 24/7 for the rest of my life and if I choose to blend my life with another’s, that is crucial.
As Joe Jackson sagely says “You can’t get what you want, til you know what you want.” There are questions I didn’t ask myself in earlier years, both pre and post-marriage and conversations that I wish I had back then. My vivid imagination conjures up images of a dynamic, ever-growing “third entity” that combines the sum of the parts of the two of us.